A Q&A About the
Schooling Right Now
Well, as most of you
know, we’ve been homeschooling for the past six years. As it comes time that so
many of my homeschooling and public school friends back in the States are
starting up their school routines, it seemed like I should probably eventually
just mention what we’re up to. And... drum roll, please... the three older kids
are going to formal school this year!
WHAT?!? you ask. Okay, maybe that’s just me. I had
to do a lot of thinking and praying and just taking deep breaths about this.
It’s... different. And now for a Q&A.
Where?
A private
Steiner/Waldorf school. The educational philosophy meshes with mine
surprisingly well, and they do all sorts of awesome things.
Why?
Look, there are a lot of
mixed up feelings about this, but I’ll try to sort some of them out. First, the
facts: I had happily been planning on continuing to homeschool in Australia and
had already connected a little with the homeschool community here. Then I kept
on seeing Facebook stuff about the Steiner school here, and it looked honestly
amazing. When we came here, there was an open house at Steiner about two weeks
later, so we went to check it out.
It’s beautiful. The
grounds are lovely and relaxing, the playgrounds are awesome, there’s sticks
and dirt and rocks, there’s a garden and just... Well, we went and looked and I
sort of teared up because I could tell it would be great, and I didn’t want to
do it. The kids were excited about the possibility of another new adventure, of
course, and they loved the grounds and met the teachers as well. So, to make a
long story short, we signed up! They’ve been in school for term 3 for about a
month now.
What’s cool about
Steiner?
It’s very hippie. They
have gardening, sewing, crocheting/knitting, music (the girls are doing violin,
and there’s also recorder and lots of singing), morning tea (just a small
snacktime in midmorning), time outside, bushwalks, festivals, etc. They do
their lessons by writing their notes in big blank books and illustrating them,
and the books are rather lovely in the end. The dress code doesn’t allow for
branded clothing or images from movies and TV, etc. They have to wear
wide-brimmed hats outside (the girls have worn them elsewhere, and many people
recognize them as Steiner kids). Lunches have to be healthy, no packages and
processed stuff (okay, this is honestly a pro—healthy!—and a con—eek! no bags
of crisps or granola bars). It’s a very slow, rhythm-focused sort of school.
Pretty much in philosophy it’s a lot of what I love about homeschooling, but
I’m not doing any of it. The kindy area (and the teacher!) is so happy and
soothing it makes me feel a little teary sometimes. :)
How are the kids liking
it?
The kids are doing
really well there so far. They love it and are having a new, very different
experience. The 11yo went on a five-day class camp to Uluru and King’s Canyon,
with camel and bike riding and hiking and all sorts of fun. She is also
learning that the entire school day, every weekday, is tiring. She is handling
it very well, though, and adjusting nicely. She got cast as Julius Caesar for
their class play, and I’m definitely looking forward to seeing her get stabbed
by all her classmates (as is she!).
The 8yo’s camp is coming
up (a shorter camp), and she’s excited too, though a little nervous. She is my
little creative dreamer, and I was worried that this transition would be hard
on her. But her teacher is a lovely woman who understands that all kids have
different strengths, and she’s made the 8yo feel at home and help her adjust.
It’s lovely to see.
The 5yo has 3.5 days per week, and his teacher (as I
already mentioned) is so fantastic. She reminds me a lot of a teacher he had at
our homeschool co-op (Mary Kate, we love you!). So chill, so loving and right
there with the kids, so focused in on them. Totally unflappable and really kind
and just wanting to be supportive of the kids. The whole kindy area is enclosed
with a fence to keep it protected and so no one can accidentally wander off,
etc. There’s a huge play area with plants and buildings that you can climb in
and a huge sandpit and stuff to garden and hammocks and... etc. It’s really
lovely. The kids all bring a piece of fruit in the morning that gets cut up for
snacks they can graze on when they’re hungry. They each have their own teacup
for water. They have weekly breadmaking and a weekly vegetable soup (where the
kids all bring vegetables and they make the soup). A weekly bushwalk. Lots of
stories and playtime and some sewing. He is really enjoying it and seems happy
to be going, and he gives me a giant hug when I come to pick him up.
This leaves me and the
3yo alone most days, which I confess is kinda hard. We’ve done errands a number
of times, and we’ve done tons of baking together—more than I normally do. So
there are advantages (the baking, the focused attention), but it’s also harder
because I’m so used to having other kids helping to entertain him. It has been
years and years since I’ve tried to do this with just one kid! It is not
my favorite.
And how are you?
Well, there are lots of
good things about this, but I’d be lying if I said I was thrilled about all of
it. A lot of my negative feelings on the subject are wrapped in
insecurities—did I do well enough with homeschooling? am I doing the right
thing now? are others going to perceive this as giving up? or will they assume I
have suddenly realized that homeschooling was a mistake? Blah blah blah, I
could go on for hours about this. But the point is that there are lots of
things I worry about, some stupid, some legit. The feelings, they are legion.
Also, I really don’t
like being on the daily school schedule (though even that has its
benefits—consistency in bedtime and getting up, which is a thing I’ve always
struggled with). And having to prepare lunches every. single. day. is pretty
much the worst thing ever (I’m only mostly kidding). And did I mention how much
I dislike being on someone else’s schedule. Look, I know that’s normal for a
lot of the working population of the world. But still, yuck. I almost blew a
gasket the other day when I had to call my kid in sick. I am realizing more and
more that I have a streak of rebellion, and I think it’s getting wider.
Did I do well enough at
homeschooling?
Yes.
Am I doing the right
thing now?
Yes.
Are others going to
perceive this as giving up?
Maybe. But are they
right? No.
Have I suddenly realized
that homeschooling was a mistake?
This is possibly one of
the things I hate most about the change—the idea that my friends who always
thought I was crazy to do it will suddenly believe they were right. I mean, I
realize this is stupid to be so worried over what people think, but there it
is.
The fact is that NO,
homeschooling was not a mistake. It was the right decision until now, just as
Steiner is the right decision for the moment. Truthfully, my suspicion is that
once this adventure is over, homeschooling will be the right decision again.
(Yes, even in high school.) I think that’s the place they’ll do the best in the
long run, both for themselves and for others.
Truthfully, I think that
doing school for a while like this is going to give them a new appreciation for
homeschooling. They knew intellectually, but not yet viscerally, about how much
free time they really have always had to pursue their own interests. How little
time they had to spend on formal “school” in order to finish all the work that
was needed for their grade levels—or more. Now they’re learning it by
experience. Both girls have mentioned that it’s so much harder to do all the
things they want to do now. So we focus in on what different experiences and
learning they’re getting right now—new things they hadn’t done before.
Truthfully, I may be
wrong about what the future holds. I was wrong about homeschooling here, for
now, so I could be wrong again. Maybe we’ll do... *tries to say the words,
gasps* ... public school? (Look, I’m not trying to spit on all my friends who
public school. I’m just saying it realllllly isn’t for me, and I’d rather not
do it for my kids.) Maybe more private school. Maybe it will be a different
style of school altogether. But I’m crossing my fingers and praying for
homeschool again.
What will you do next?
Um, oops. I already
answered that question above.
Time for another serious
moment?
Yes.
I’m still having a lot
of ups and downs about school, honestly. I see all the fun new opportunities
that they have, and I’m happy about it. I see all the things that they’re
missing out on, and I’m sad about it. I get asked what school my kids are in,
and it just about kills me that I can just name a school instead of saying,
“Oh, we homeschool.” I had no idea how much of my identity had been tied to
homeschooling until I voluntarily relinquished it. It has, honestly, left a
gaping hole. I’m still figuring out how to fill that and how to leave room for
change in the future. The old adage about “the one constant is change,” blah
blah blah... I’ve never been great with change, so I’m stretching those muscles
and trying some new things. It’s hard, and I miss who I was. But I’ve always
really liked Elastigirl, so maybe this is my chance to learn to be more
stretchy.
But honestly, don’t you
just love having everyone gone from home?
Ummm, the 3yo is still
home. So it doesn’t really count. (And no, not really.)
Summary statement?
Change and flexibility
and growth: good. Having to pack daily lunches: bad. Outsourcing lunch packing
to children: good. Never getting to pack crisps or juice boxes: bad and good.
Learning to make healthy muffins and yogurt and whole wheat bread: good.
Net effect of learning
to change and do something new: grudgingly good.
